The everything bagel: mysterious origins? (niznoz/Creative Commons)

Who knew that the bagel with multiple toppings –AKA the everything bagel– is a source of such controversy? At least, the credit for its invention is.

David Gussin, a New Yorker who worked in a bakery in 1980, claims he invented the everything bagel in a burst of inspiration while sweeping out the oven, reported the New Yorker. One day, when cleaning out the charred pieces that had fallen off the bagels –poppy seeds, sesame seeds, salt, etc.– he had an idea.

He made a suggestion to his boss: ‘Hey, Charlie, instead of throwing them away, put this on a bagel and call it the “everything.”‘ Apparently Charlie complied, because Gussin says customers went crazy for ordering it, and a legend was born.

Or was it?

Not true, says marketing guru Seth Godin via his blog, remembering baking everything bagels in the bagel factory where he worked back in 1977. He also says that the seed-sweeping story is “crazy” –that the oven sweepings would be too incinerated to use to top a bagel.

Gussin persists anyway, and has added a line to his website that says “It was the late 1970’s, possibly early 80’s,” moving up the date a bit and building in some flexibility. He’s upset at Godin’s suggestion: “[The bagel] brings smiles to people’s faces. It doesn’t deserve controversy. It’s a nice thing.”

As for me, I’m on the side of an Internet commenter who asked: “Are we really to believe that the world waited until 1977 for the invention of the everything bagel? Somebody’s grandfather in Warsaw is going to be getting a phone call soon.”

The everything bagel is most likely a case of what is known in the trademark world as “simultaneous invention,” that is, something that more than one person came up with around the same time. How could anyone working in a bagel bakery not think of combining the toppings?

It’s like making a suicide at the soda fountain. How many gajillions of twelve-year-old boys can claim they invented that?

Smoked salmon in a cream cheese-y, garlicky sauce.

The everything bagel, regardless of how many people invented it, was my inspiration for this creamy pasta sauce. It has everything I love about bagels: cream cheese, smoked salmon and plenty of garlic, for starters.

Make it even more everything bagel-like by adding more of your favorite bagel toppings. I used poppy seeds, but feel free to add a dusting of sesame seeds, sea salt, or extra bits of roasted garlic.

Slow Cooker Everything Bagel Pasta Sauce

Ingredients:

8 oz. cream cheese, cut into small pieces (regular or reduced fat)
4 oz. smoked salmon, flaked
2 cloves garlic, minced
Ground black pepper
1-2 green onions, chopped
1 1/2 cups milk
1 tsp. poppy seeds

Directions: Combine first six ingredients in the crock of your slow cooker, stir well, and cook on high for one hour or low for two hours. (For this recipe I used my Rival 1.5 quart mini, which does not have settings. It’s either on or off. It was ready and bubbly hot after about one hour.)

Serve over cooked pasta of your choice; sprinkle with poppy seeds.

If you or someone you know came up with an everything bagel pasta sauce before me, call the New Yorker. We can have a big ol’ Internet feud and rack up some page views.

Kale bruschetta gives leftover greens a higher purpose.

Why do leftovers have such a bad reputation? Well, it could be the sloppy way they get reheated, for one. Microwaving isn’t a cooking technique that does any food a favor, with the exception of, perhaps, frozen Hot Pockets (which aren’t very good straight out of the package.)

Even when home cooks attempt to whip up leftovers into something else, it’s often a something else that wouldn’t sound too tempting even if it weren’t made with yesterday’s dinner: hashes, casseroles, anything with the word surprise tacked on. (How much of a surprise can it be when you already had it for dinner yesterday?)

It doesn’t help that a lot of  leftovers may have been left over for a reason. If a meatloaf was only mediocre to begin with, meatloaf hash has nowhere to go but down.

That’s why it’s so exciting to launch a new category on Crock Tease just for using up your crock-pot leftovers. The Not-So-Sloppy Seconds recipes are just as good or even better than the recipes that inspire them, and you’ll want to slow cook up some of the original Crock Tease recipes to have leftovers on purpose for making them.

Slow Cooker Flowering Kale is the base recipe for this distinctly un-run-of-the-mill bruschetta. It combines the peppery bite of kale with a bit of aged Manchego. You’ve heard of the Man of La Mancha? Well, this is the cheese of La Mancha, and its rustic taste blends nicely with the slow-cooked kale.

If you don’t have, or can’t find, Manchego cheese, substitute fresh Parmesan, Romano, Pecorino, or Asiago. (If you can’t find any of those, then stop buying your groceries from the gas station or slap your cheesemonger –whichever applies.)

Bruschetta with Slow-Cooked Kale and Manchego Cheese Recipe

Ingredients:

1 cup of slow-cooked kale , warmed (either reheated or straight out of the slow cooker if you just made it)
1-2 oz Manchego cheese, grated
1 loaf of crusty bread, sliced
Extra virgin olive oil
Optional: Fresh minced garlic and balsamic vinegar

Directions: Brush each slice of bread with olive oil on both sides. Heat a griddle on top of the stove and grill the bread a few minutes until light brown on bottom, then flip over and top with a few pieces of kale and a sprinkling of Manchego cheese. Grill until cheese is melted, covering with a lid if necessary.

You may wish to add extra garlic and a few drops of balsamic vinegar to taste to your kale before topping, depending on how much seasoning you used in slow-cooking the kale.

See? Leftovers can be even better than the first round. Aren’t you glad it isn’t kale loaf?

The kale turns darker after slow cooking, but still retains some of its purple tint.

It’s not everyday you cook a lawn ornament. It’s been centuries since anyone actually spit-roasted a flamingo, and most other yard decorations would resist any type of cooking method imaginable. Spaghetti and gazing balls, anyone? What about a ragout of concrete St. Francis? Does anyone know what oven temperature to use for two-frogs-on-a-loveseat?

Nope, ornamental cabbage is the only lawn decor I’ve ever heard of that makes a good meal. That’s because those ornamental cabbages you see lining the lawns of the Ladies’ Horticultural Society members’ homes are masquerading under an alias. Their real name is kale.

Even the core looks pretty.

Ornamental kale is every bit as edible as regular ol’ kale (they’re not trying to trick you  by putting it in the produce section.) It’s not only a tasty variety of leafy greens, but it’s spectacularly beautiful to cook and work with. The purple flowering kale I bought may have been cheap, but it could practically be a work of art.

I’m considering using a head of kale as a wedding bouquet –it’s that lovely. It reminds me of some kind of exotic sea creature, like an anemone, with its mass of purple stems like undulating tentacles.

Kale leaves, ready for the slow cooker.

In the South, most greens are cooked with a chunk of pork fat or a smoked turkey wing, and that’s dandy. All greens taste better with a bit of seasoning. But, try cooking a pot of kale in your slow cooker with Mediterranean-style seasonings and you may never look back. Olive oil, balsamic, and some fresh garlic are really all that’s needed to bring the kale to the height of its flavor.

Some may find kale to be too bitter, and it is one of the more bitter types of greens. For those who enjoy a peppery bite, though, they’ll enjoy the pleasant pungency. A quick blanching before tossing in the crock-pot removes the harshness of the bitter taste, leaving just enough to add a kick.

Blanching the kale leaves before tossing in the crock-pot.

Slow Cooker Flowering Kale Recipe

Ingredients:

2 bunches kale
1/2 large red onion, chopped
2 cloves garlic, minced
Salt and ground pepper to taste
Dash red pepper flakes
1 tsp balsamic vinegar
1 tbsp olive oil
2 cups vegetable broth

Directions: Bring a pot of salted water to boiling and add kale. Boil for 3-6 minutes, just until wilted to reduce bitterness. Drain and cool. Tear leaves into bite-sized bits, being careful to remove the thickest part of the stem. Combine kale and other ingredients in the crock of your slow cooker. Cook on low for 4-6 hours or more, or cook on high for 2-3 hours or more. Longer cooking makes the kale more tender.

Serve kale as side dish with any Southern-style or Mediterranean-style meal. And stay tuned, because you’ll love what I did with the leftovers.

Tip: Buy your own kale, no matter how tempting old lady Wanklestein’s looks in her front yard. The old biddy’s got the cops and the neighborhood association on speed dial.

Lately it seems like every bar or restaurant has its own upscale version, from steakhouses with rib eye or Kobe beef sliders to San Francisco’s Hotel Monaco with their gougere d’escargot (snail sliders). Mainstream restaurants like P.F. Chain’s and Pepperbee’s have started falling all over themselves to add mini burgers to their menus.

It’s an odd trend considering that the oldest use of the word “slider” in relation to food was less than flattering. As far back as the ’40s and ’50s, sailors in the Navy referred to their greasy mess hall burgers as sliders –in other words, so slippery with grease that they slid right down your throat.

These slow cooker pulled chicken sliders are far from greasy, and you won’t find them in the mess hall, unless it’s in the sailors’ fantasies. Make a crock-pot full of spicy pulled chicken for a party, and keep it warm in the crock all night while folks make their own mini BBQ sandwiches onParker House rolls, mini buns, or tea-sized biscuits.

The combination of white and dark meat results in the best flavor. Some people prefer the light taste of white meat alone, but the addition of the thighs (which have a slightly higher fat content) allows for more moisture and flavor as the chicken slowly cooks.

Tiny, but packed with BBQ flavor.

Slow Cooker Pulled BBQ Chicken Sliders Recipe

Ingredients:

2 1/2 lbs boneless, skinless chicken breasts and thighs
2 cups BBQ sauce
1 med onion chopped finely
2 cloves garlic, minced
1 chopped hot pepper or several hits from a bottle of your favorite hot sauce

Directions: Combine all ingredients in the crock of your slow cooker. Cover and cook on low for 5-6 hours, or high for 2 1/2 to 3 hours. Remove chicken breasts to a bowl and use two forks to shred thoroughly, then return to crock and stir to combine with sauce. Keep on warm to let your guests make their own sandwiches onParker House-style rolls or mini sandwich bread of your choice.

Tips: If you’d like to use a homemade sauce, you can adjust or leave out the other seasonings if they’re present in your own recipe. Most commercial sauces need the extra kick.

If you’re not in the mood for a slider –and let’s face it, sometimes you want a big ol’ sandwich– use regular-sized bread, whip up a side of slaw, and pile your BBQ to the sky. Now that’s redneck sushi.